Philalawyer and I continue our conversation on American hang-ups, this time talking about everyone’s favorite topic: sex. Below is an excerpt and click here to read the piece in its entirety.
Dr. Rob: Like pinot noir, football and the Wii, sex is what makes America great. So it can be frustrating to listen to uber-conservatives prattle on about its immorality. And I agree that sex is used as a controlling device in both popular and religious culture. That being said, I caution every young client I see about the inherent vulnerability that comes with sexuality. There’s something in our hard-wiring that makes sex more than just orgasms. Our bodies were created to do it as much as possible, yet the psychological ramifications of it can be huge. When people are forced into it they often never recover, no matter how much therapy or medicine you give them. Men are taught that there’s a direct link between their self-esteem and how much tail they get. Women are labeled as sluts for having sexual expression. And while our bodies are prepped for sex at a young age, our psychological development lags far behind. So if sex is a superior force as you describe, our sexual education needs to focus not just on proper condom use and where to buy a dental dam, but also on how to work with this force so that the sexual experience is more fulfilling from a psychological standpoint. That might help our culture lose some of the neurosis you describe.