My agent told me that it’s very important to increase my media exposure. He said that so many promising books ultimately get passed on by publishers due to the author simply being an unknown commodity. Publishing is about business, not art, and those who decide which books hit the shelves and which stay on authors’ laptops want some assurances. I stressed that my
millions of readers would definitely be interested in reading my book, but he was unimpressed.
“Get out there and do interviews, give quotes, get on television. Start getting people to think about the name ‘Dr. Rob.'”
“So whore myself out?” I asked.
So there you have it. If one of your New Year’s resolutions was to be a nicer person, here’s your chance to aid me in my emotional prostitution. If you are involved with the media and need an expert (and let’s not kid ourselves, you’ve seen me on tv, so the term ‘expert’ is very loosely defined here), I’m your man. If you have a popular website and would like a contribution, please let me know (I’ll be sure to provide a link on this site if you wish to increase your readership). As long as it doesn’t involve excessive nudity (i.e., more than five minutes), contact me. In short, stop contacting Dr. Phil and Dr. Drew for your mental health consultations. I’m a much cheaper date.